Stupid Stuff Transpires Annually

Here we are, in another year. And JJ is still doing Stupid Stuff.

To be fair, it happened last month... 41 hours after my sister dropped the kids off with him for the holidays.

41 hours! That's nearly 2 days. How did he manage to last that long?

JMJ was misbehaving. More than that... he beat up HER oldest son. He won't tell me why.

Now, SHE doesn't want JMJ in her house. I don't blame HER.

I told JMJ that if I had a boyfriend whose child beat him up, I wouldn't want that child in my home.

JJ is using it as an excuse to not have JMJ visit him anymore.

That is a problem.

JMJ is a challenge to parent. I really need that little bit of time off for myself. It is in the kids' best interest.

How do I tell JJ that?

JJ has his own place. He does not live with HER. That means there is no reason why he can't have both kids visit him. The don't have to go anywhere near HER place.

In fact, I see no reason why he can't have both kids even if he did live with HER. He could visit the kids at his mother's place. Or at his sister's place. It's only 2 weekends a month.

I'm going to have to consult with a lawyer on this one.

And soon.

Alone (I've Said That Before)

My sister and niece were here on the weekend. They are gone now. The kids are at their dads'. FdM is away.

It's just me and my dog now.

I've been sick for the last week or so. I had no voice all weekend. I'm still a little hoarse, but since nobody is here, I have no need to speak.

I am alone.

I played Scrabble on FaceBook all day today. I've had enough of computers for a while now. But I have nothing else to do right now.

It is only 8:45, and I am considering going to bed. I didn't get up until 10:30 this morning. Short day.

After being alone for 29 hours, I am only feeling lonely now.

I spoke to my dad today... he answered the phone when I called to see if my sister made it there ok. DL called to check on me because she knows I've been ill. GU called... we need to get together sometime this week to discuss business. Alltogether, about 20 minutes of phone calls.

Now, I'm alone.

I don't want much... I just want someone to talk to. Someone to cuddle with. A warm body next to mine.

Now I'm getting weepy. I better increase my dose tomorow.

Doctors' orders.

The real reason I sleep is so time will pass more quickly. I don't want to be alone, so I sleep to avoid it.

There are worse things.

I don't know where I'm going with this. Nowhere, I guess.

I'm lonely.

That's all.

How Does He Do This To Me?

Yesterday, JJ called me. He doesn't know what to do with JMJ. He is defiant, refusing to go to school, and just taking up space doing nothing. So, JJ wants him to come back home.

JMJ wants to come back home.

Of course, JJ couldn't tell me that without also telling me that I'm a bad parent and making me really, REALLY mad first.

PMS time again.

I just got off the phone with him. JJ told me he is depressed. He is having financial problems, and he just lost his biggest account today. This is at least partly due to the time he had to take off work to get JMJ settled into school.

I could hear it in his voice... he is stressed. More than he is willing to admit... and he already admitted it! So, I know it's bad.

JJ has always refused to believe that depression is a medical condition. It is unlikely he will look for help. Instead, he told me that he won't be able to take the kids every second weekend anymore. I guess he thinks that will make a difference to his financial situation. I don't see how.

So now he has me worried about him. How does he do it. When he is depressed, he stops trying. I've seen it happen before. He needs help... but it is unlikely he will listen to me. It is more likely that in 5 years, he will tell me I was right. That doesn't help him now.

On the positive side, I did not get mad when he said he didn't want the kids as often in the coming months. He calmly explained himself, and then presented it as a solution. I know it is no solution. I also know he is not in a mental state where he will listen to me.

I think the best thing for me to do for him is to write a brief email suggesting he discuss it with his doctor. If being depressed is affecting his work performance, and enjoyment of life, it needs to be discussed. If I can get him to visit his doctor, then it is the doctors' job to explain it to him.

I will sleep on it. I'll email him in the morning.

Depression Update

I ran out of anti-depressants nearly two weeks ago. I called the pharmacy to get a refill, and was informed that I could not have any more until I saw my doctor.

It took a couple of days to get in to see my doctor. I told him I needed a refill. We discussed my recent history... I was taking only 100mg all summer, when he had prescribed 150mg. By the time I ran out, I was taking 150mg again. I told him I wanted to stay on 150mg for a while longer. So, he wrote me a prescription.

I took it to the pharmacy, and told them I would pick it up after work.

Then I forgot.

So, I went yet another day without them.

By the time I finally took a dose, I had been without them for 5 days.

That night, I woke up at 3:30 and couldn't get back to sleep. My tummy was upset and my ears were ringing.

The next night, I woke up around 4:00 and couldn't get back to sleep. My tummy was upset, I was light-headed and my ears were ringing.

The third night, I woke up around 4:00 and couldn't get back to sleep. My tummy was upset, I was light-headed, my ears were ringing and my heart was beating fast.

I stopped taking them.

I don't know why they were affecting me like that... I've been taking the same thing for a year and a half.

I called the doctor the next morning -- Friday. His earliest availablility was Wednesday. I did not want to see some other doctor, so I asked the receptionist if there was any way I could get in to see him. She told me to call 8:30 Monday morning... the doctors at the clinic have started saving some appointment times each day so their regular patients can get in to see them.

Works for me!

I called Monday morning, and saw him early Monday afternoon.

After telling him what was happening, he suggested flushing my system of the anti-depressants. I am off them for one week. I see him again on Monday to discuss what to do next. He does not want me going through the holidays without them.

It is Thursday today. I have been off them for nearly a week now. I slept quite well the last couple of days. I have not been weepy at all.

Of course, nothing out of the ordinary has happened. No arguements with JJ. No problems with the kids. I have spoken to FdM nearly every day the last two weeks.

I am feeling pretty good right now.

Grocery Store Update

Yesterday morning, I took my unwanted boneless, skinless drumsticks to the grocery store, went to the Customer Service counter, and said "I have a meat complaint".

I told the person there how I had purchased boneless, skinless chicken thighs, and found the drumstick meat wrapped up in the middle of it. I told her how I removed the unwanted portion of the meat and cooked the rest for supper.

She immediately apologised. She did not hesitate to refund me the full purchase price. Then she offered me a new package of boneless, skinless chicken thighs for free.

She went and talked to the butcher, who prepared a package for me (16 pieces!). He told her that someone had mis-identified the cut, thus the incorrect label.

Since I have never had this happen before, and I have been shopping at the same store for 7 years, I accepted the explanation.

And the free meat.

I have told a few people about this. That is why the store was so willing to give me a refund and make ammends. Word of mouth is a powerful means of advertizing. They would rather have me tell people how they made things right, than have me complaining about them.

That works for me. I would rather have them make things right with me than have something to complain about.

They did make ammends.

And then some.

Grocery Store Rant

The grocery store I shop at, I chose because I like the quality of their meats and produce. I have to keep an eye on their pricing... they like to raise the price of meats that are going on sale next week, so I think I'm getting a better deal than I really am. For that reason, I always have in mind maximum prices I am willing to pay for different cuts of meat.

What they did today, though, was outright lie!

I bought a family pack of boneless, skinless chicken thighs. What I found when I opened the package was boneless, skinless chicken legs. Each thigh was wrapped around the drumstick meat!

I hate drumsticks. They are nothing more than a mass of tendons with rubbery snot-balls attached to them.

Had the packages been labeled "boneless, skinless chicken legs", I would have bought something else.

Of course, I did not know that was what they had done until I was home, ready to make supper, and opened the package.

So, I cut the drumstick meat off each piece, and put it back in the package. I diced the thighs and threw them into my wok as planned -- half as much meat as I was expecting. I wanted lots of leftovers for the freezer.

Tomorow, I will be visiting my grocery store with the drumsticks in their wrongly-marked package.

It is not what I selected.

I do not want them.

And I am going to let them know it.

Mom With Power Tools In Experimental Mode

I do not have cable TV. It has been over a year since I last had cablevision.

I was bored a couple nights ago, so I tried an experiment. I attempted to build a TV antenna. At least then I can have 4 or 5 channels.

Supplies

• plywood
• wire coat hangers
• coaxial cable

Built a small box out of plywood. Drilled two holes in the top. Cut top off two hangers and inserted them into the holes. Twisted ends of hangers together inside box. Used staple gun to stabilize hangers on top of the box. Used electricians' tape to attach coaxial cable to bottom ends of hangers.

Then I hooked it up to my TV.

It did not work.

I was not sure if it would work or not. It was worth a try... and it gave me something to do for an hour. Best of all, it did not cost me anything! Buying antennae is out of the question... I don't have $20. If I did, I would have cable!

In the process, I did find instructions online to make a simple antenna from 300 ohm twin-lead line. It is inexpensive... if I can find anyone who still carries it!

Mom With Power Tools is satisfied... she tried something new and learned something in the process.

It was a good project.

Alone

That triggered an emotional response.

Early today, VN said I seemed lonely. Later in the day, LH said I looked tired. I felt lethargic. I have been sleeping alot the last few days. Then today, I had no appetite.

That was the thing that told me what is wrong -- No Appetite.

I am depressed.

I enjoyed a good laugh over JJs latest escapades.

Then, I was alone.

I initially felt somewhat overwhelmed at work today. It seemed like every 10 minutes, another job fell onto my desk. I caught myself jumping from task to task, not really accomplishing anything. It was difficult, but I managed to make myself finish a task. Then I made myself finish another task. Before I knew it, everything was done.

Then, I was alone.

I wasted some time on the computer, and some more work came into the office. By the time I left work for the day, I had a days' work sitting on my desk again, with a promise to have it ready for next Tuesday.

Now, at home, IJ asleep, I am alone again.

The house is so quiet. I sit here at the computer, not really wanting to do anything, but not wanting to go to bed. In bed, the house is even more quiet. I am even more alone.

Once in bed, I try to read. Some nights I can't concentrate on the book, and I give up. The last few nights, I have been awake late reading. I have been unwilling to turn off the light. In the dark silence, I am so alone.

Then, I wake up. I wake up, and I do not want to move. The house is quiet and empty. Everything is so still. I don't want to face it. I don't want to be alone.

I want to be asleep.

When I am asleep, I am not alone. When I am asleep, I meet interesting people and do interesting things.

I am not alone.

For a little while.

JJ and HER

JMJ was telling me about his dad again this weekend. He tells me that JJ and HER fight alot. They yell at each other alot. They aren't getting along very well.

JMJ didn't say what they were fighting about. Just that his dad said "pack your bags... we're leaving!"

This was just a week ago. That means JJ is keeping HER PMS to himself now.

After some more fighting, and some calmer conversation, they made up.

Wow! I don't know how much longer those two will be together. VN expects JJ to come crawling back to me any day now. I think he is too smart for that... he knows I won't take him back.

I would rather be alone for the rest of my life.

November 9, 2007

6:00am
The cat wakes me up, crying at the front door. Crying and crying and crying and crying.... Finally he stopped. Then I heard the kitty door swinging. Did he go out, or did he stick his head out and change his mind? I hear him jump onto the floor. Then he cries a couple more times. He stops. I decide I should go let him out so he doesn't pee in the bathtub.

In the living room, I call and call... no cat. I open the door and look outside. I call him. No cat. I go back to bed.

10 minutes later, I hear the cat jump onto his perch outside. I hear the kitty door swinging. I hear the cat jump onto the floor. Then he is on my bed, beside my pillow. He did go outside! He finally figured it out!

I lavish him with praise, telling him what a smart kitty he is.


7:15
Phone rings. I answer it. It is VN, calling to say happy birthday. I hang up.


7:30
Clock radio turns on. I listen to music for an hour then get up. Kept IJ home from school today. We spent some time on bible study together. DL joined us later.


11:30
IJ and I go to the mall to check out the craft fair. We smelled something really good. We went looking for it. Our noses lead us towards to grocery store. We went in to see if they had fresh cookies. The aroma was not coming from there. We exit. Slowly, we move through the mall... and find it!

Fresh, candied almonds!

We hit the jackpot! They were still too hot to eat. I bought some. Tasty.


12:45
We locate VN, and all go out to my car. We head home.


12:55
I am stopped on the road, signaling a left turn. Lots of traffic coming towards me. I check my rearview mirror -- a car is stopped a reasonable distance behind me. I look forwards again, but something catches my eye. I look in the mirror again... there is a truck coming up fast behind the car! No time to react... I tense up. I hear a sickening crash... followed by another crunch... tires screeching on the road... and my rear bumper is tapped.

Wow! Did we ever get lucky! All three of us had seatbelts with shoulder straps on. The car behind me saw the truck coming, and planted his foot on the break and set his handbreak. He got the worst of it. Initially, everyone was ok. By the time the police arrived, the driver behind me was feeling dizzy. They got him an ambulance.

My digital camera was in the car, so I took it out and took an overview picture followed by front and rear photos of each vehicle. I'll post some later.

The first thing the cop said was "Let me guess... someone was making a left turn,"

I put up my hand and said "that was me".

"... was hit from behind, and then another vehicle hit from behind."

"Close," I said. "The white car was hit from behind, and was pushed into me."

She started taking names, beginning with me. I gave her my licence, and I watched her write my birthdate in her notebook.

"I knew there was something I had to do today," I exclaimed. "My licence expires today!"

"Don't worry about it," she said.

She finished up with me and I got to go home.

Other stuff happened today... ran errands with DL, had a chiropractor visit, got a prescription from my GP for some skin cream, went to renew my licence... right after they locked the door! Ordered Chinese food, picked JMJ up at the ferry, arrived at the drug store minutes before they closed to fill out my prescription (the pharmacist was so nice... he turned his computers back on and filled it out right away).

I'm ready to sleep now.

What a day!

I Hate Having An Ex

JJ emailed me today about holidays for the next year. He only wants the kids until Dec 28. He wants to share Spring Break. And he wants them for the month of August.

When I saw his email in my inbox, I knew it would upset me. I determined not to reply to it today. I don't want to let my emotions antagonize the situtation. Besides, PMS week is looming. I have to be careful what I say this week, lest HER PMS be projected onto me.

The Dates
August is fine. July has better weather anyway.

Spring Break is 1 1/2 weeks this year... and I want to take them to Edmonton. That is a 3 day drive one way. That doesn't leave enough time to share.

And I have never had them before January 2 before. That's a problem. Especially this year: school doesn't start until January 7.


JJ said in his email that he has never had the kids for the whole Winter Break before. That is not true. He always does.

He also said he doesn't sit around doing nothing anymore.

That hurt.

JJ wants to do things with HER. He did whatever he could to avoid doing things with me. Now he wants to do things, and I'm supposed to be flexible for him.

For years, I have wanted to do something just for me over Winter Break. I have never had the money. It is the end of my "off-season", and there is no money left in the bank. So I usually sit around, depressed, wishing I had something to do. Wishing that I was in Montreal, photographing the Old City or ice skating on the canal.

I have had too many disappointments this year. I can't just not make plans again. I have to do something. I don't want to spend another winter just wishing.


I am going to go make some plans now. JJ needs to know what dates I can take the kids so he can make his own plans. I am certain I will not be around on the 28th. My back-up plan, in case I couldn't make it to Montreal, was to spend New Years' in a cabin at a hot spring with single friends.

Mom With Power Tools Returns

Unwilling to let one failure stop her, Mom With Power Tools embarks on a new project.

Well, not really new. Just something she has never attempted before. The project has been waiting to be done for two years or more (something JJ never got around to).

In typical manner, there is no overhead lighting in my living room. My dining room is at one end of the living room, and also has no overhead lighting. A couple of weeks ago, I bumped into my only lamp and broke it.

It has been very dark lately.

JJs sister was redecorating a couple of years ago, and JJ brought me a light fixture that she no longer needed. He intended to put a cord on it and hang it over the dining room table.

It never got done.

Today, Mom With Power Tools decided it was about time it was done.

Off to the hardware store, looking for suitable electrical wire for the job. Found "portable swag lighting kit". Nearly perfect. It has a pull-chain on the bulb socket. Locate a rocker switch. Now, it is perfect.

Back home, Mom disassembles the old light fixture. It now has no electrical parts. That makes it easy to wash... put it in the dishwasher! Now, it sparkles.

Thread wire through chain. Install two ceiling hooks. Splice rocker switch into electrical cord. Make sure fixture is dry, and wire it with the new light socket. Add one light bulb, hang the light, and plug it in.

I have light!

And to think I have always avoided electrical work. It is the only course I ever failed in school (34% - not even close to passing). Aptitude tests have revealed that I would be bored as an electrician. That does not mean I cannot do it. It just means I had no motivation to pass the course.

Mom With Power Tools has regained her confidence.

I can do anything!

I am Mom.

What's next?

Playing With Phone Solicitors

The phone rang last night. I answered it. A male voice I did not recognize politely asked for Mrs. J.

I said "there's no one here by that name."

He said "oh."

He didn't have anything else to say, so I hung up.

Then I started to laugh. I laughed hard! It made my tummy ache, I laughed so hard!

I needed a good laugh.

It was a very satisfying experience. I stopped a phone solicitor, and I didn't even have to lie to do it.

I am no longer Mrs. J.

I am Ms. H.



That was fun.

What Is It Like To Be Drunk?

I have never analyzed what it feels like to be drunk before.

So, here it goes.

I have had 2 ciders, followed by 2 glasses of Apfel Korn (I think I had 2).

I am typing slowly. I am rocking back and forth, or side to side, as the mood takes me. I guess, in general, my head is swimming. It only took the two ciders to reach that point.

I can't walk a straight line... I touch anything solid I see as I walk past it to ensure my stability (physical, not mental).

My tongue is numb. My chin and cheeks also. Other parts of my body seem to have the same sensitivity to touch as normal (arms, hands, legs, feet). It takes a moment for my eyes to focus on the screen if I look away for a moment.

I make more typos.

I am more indecisive. I have backspaced over sentences, only to type the exact same thing again.

I have my wits about me enough to know I absolutely cannot drive... and I believe that if I have one more drink, I will be puking soon afterwards.

My nose is also numb.

Strange, the order that I notice these things.

My priorites seem to be different. I am planning to go to bed soon, without brushing my teeth.

Right now, I am thinking about having a glass of water... I remember Grandma telling me once that she never got hangovers... because she always drank a glass of water before bed. A cousin also told me once that if he woke up with a headache, he would drink a full glass of water, and go back to bed for a half hour to prevent a hang over.

My tummy isn't entirely pleased with me at the moment. I don't know if a glass of water will settle it, or make me puke. I guess if I puke, it is something I need to do.

I usually trust that my body knows what is best for me. I fulfill it's cravings, and honour it's aversions.

A glass of water is an aversion at the moment.

I think I will have one anyway.

Or, at least I will brush my teeth and drink as much water as I can tolerate. The mint in the toothpaste makes me thirsty. Maybe that will help.

If it doesn't, I guess I will be taking some tylenol in the morning.

Movies

Different movies mean different things to me. The movie I am watching can be an indication of my mood. This is a list of movies, with their corresponding moods:


War Of The Roses
I first saw this movie with JJ early in our marriage. We laughed all the way through the movie. Afterwards, we both figured that was how we were going to end up one day.

I watch this movie when I am depressed about my relationship. I rented it during unhappy times in my marriage, and I purchased a copy a couple of months ago when the video store was selling off their VHS tapes. I now watch it when JJ is being a jerk. I have also watched it when I was unhappy with FdM.

Every time I watch it, I am amazed by the behaviour of the Roses. How do two people reach that point where they are actually trying to kill each other?

The movie is comforting in a morbid way: someone else is more unhappy than I am.

(FYI) I am watching this movie while I blog tonight.

Shrek / Shrek 2
I love alternate fairy tales. These two were brilliantly done! (Shrek the Third was disappointing)

Sometimes I watch these movies when I want to listen to music. Other times I watch them because I am lonely.

Shrek is lonely. Fiona feels very much alone when she is not true to her feelings. In the end, they are together.

It gives me hope for the future.


The First Wives Club
Three friends getting revenge on their husbands -- all of whom left them for younger women.

I watch this movie when I am thinking about JJ and want to cheer up. It has a happy ending -- and not just for the wives. One of the husbands has a happy ending, too.

I am not a revenge-seeking person. I would never plot, pursue or procure revenge. I do enjoy watching these women pull it off.

In the end, one of the husbands figures out that he made a huge mistake... and his wife takes him back. He was lucky that his wife still loved him and chose to forgive him.

This gives me hope -- hope that JJ will one day figure it out, too. It is too late for him... I will not forgive and take him back. I just want him to figure it out. I'm not looking for revenge... but I will be pleased to know he realized his loss.

I watch this movie when I am thinking about JJ and want to cheer up. It has a happy ending -- and not just for the wives. One of the husbands has a happy ending, too.

Knights Tale
The under-dog overcoming the odds to achieve his goals.

I am not necessarily in a particular mood when I watch this movie. I like the music. I like the story. If I'm in a bad mood, the love story lifts my spirits. If I'm in a good mood, I really connect with William's desire to be more than he is.

And I like to laugh.


Beauty And The Beast
I was touched by this story more than a decade before Disney got hold of it.

I have always been non-conventional. As a teenager, my friends would be mooning over some actor, going on about how cute he was. I couldn't see it. Generally, if others think a guy is particularly good-looking, I find him bland; ordinary. I am more interested in the unique.

I watch this movie (Disney version) when I am bored, or happy. I identify with Belle... the people around me notice that I am different, too. I like that her compassion and humility allow her to get to know the Beast and befriend him. I don't like shallow, narrow-minded people.

This story always makes me feel good.


The Little Mermaid
She gave up so much for the love of a man.

From the first time I saw the Disney version, I hated it. I saw a movie of this story more than a decade earlier, when I was about 8 years old.

This story had a strong effect on me. It is the ruler with which I measure all emotion.

It starts with the little mermaid rescuing the prince after his ship sinks. She falls in love, and sells her voice for a pair of legs. In the end, the prince marries someone else. One of the mermaids sisters sells her long hair to the sea witch for a dagger which she gives to the little mermaid. If she would kill the prince with it, she would become a mermaid again. She stands over the sleeping prince with the dagger in her hand, but she cannot kill him. Instead, she uses the dagger on herself. As she dies, she becomes a mermaid again.

I would cry every time I watched the movie. I would promise myself I would never watch it again. Then, when it was on TV again a few months later, I wouldn't be able to tear myself away from it.

The idea of a love so intense that she would give up so much captivated me. Not only did she give up a magical life as a mermaid to be with him, she took her own life rather than see him die (I never saw it as her committing suicide because she couldn't have him... I always saw it as her not wanting him to die).

If I'm watching Disney's version, then I am in a strange mood. I will watch the movie, then complain about how the story was changed. It lacks the emotional intensity of the original story. I am likely looking for an arguement. Not to be contrary, but to have a lively discussion.


Any Foreign Language Film
I like to rent foreign language movies when I am alone. The kids don't have the patience to read a movie. It is just as well... they usually aren't suitable for children.

I find these movies intellectually stimulating. I usually can't watch the whole thing in one sitting... it requires too much concentration.

What I like about these films is that they are not white-washed Hollywood fairy tales. They don't shy away from showing a little dirt. A body isn't naked to titilate the audience... it is naked because people are usually naked when in that particular situation.

The subject matter of the films is also different. One that stands out in my mind is a Polish film about security personel in the subway. Can you imagine Hollywood filming an entire movie in the subway?

Use of languages also stands out for me. Many European films freely integrate different languages. It is not uncommon to find two or three different languages spoken in a single film. The more I study languages, the more I appreciate this feature. It is a wonderful experience to realize that I suddenly understand the dialogue... even when it is not in English. It encourages me to continue to learn more... and to rent more foreign langage movies.

When I'm watching foreign films, I'm looking for a unique experience. I'm opening up to the varied possibilities in the world. My mind is fully engaged -- both to keep up with reading the dialogue, and to take in and appreciate how it differs from the pablum that Hollywood feeds me.


Star Trek: Voyager Episodes
I have a dozen tapes of Voyager episodes I recorded. Yes, I am a Trekkie. I enjoy Star Trek in all of its forms.

Sometimes I'm watching Voyager because I want to escape to a different time and place. Nothing odd there... isn't that why people watch TV in general?

FdM likes Voyager. It is one of the first things we did together: watch my Voyager tapes. Now, when I am lonely, Voyager is one of the things I like to watch.

If I am watching an episode I have seen with FdM, it reminds me of when we watched it together. If I am watching and episode he has not seen yet, I think about how much he will enjoy it when he does see it.

So, when I watch Star Trek: Voyager, I am with FdM; whether he is here or not.


Teddy Ruxpin
This is a wonderful adventure series. It is non-violent and still manages to be exciting.

I enjoy watching this cartoon with my kids. It is an extended adventure... each series of events is a part of the whole, larger story. The show proves that it is possible to be interesting and exciting without an adult rating.

I sometimes watch this show without my kids. I am attracted to the friendship enjoyed by Teddy and his friends. They are extremely loyal to each other -- which is an attribute I value highly. It is all so simple for them: Help your friends, and tolerate your enemies. It is nice to have things laid out that simply from time to time.

I am usually in a pretty neutral mood when I am the one to put Teddy Ruxpin in the VCR. The simplicity of the Good VS Evil scenario keeps me in a good mood.


Star Wars The original trilogy
I am nostalgic when I watch these movies.

I was 10 years old when I saw Star Wars for the first time in 1977. I grew up anticipating the next episode.

As I watch the movies, it invokes memories of the first time I saw each of them, memories of the speculation surrounding the "teasers" we read in magazines (Han Solo decorates Jabba's palace -- how many ways can we interpret those words?). We used to write our own radio plays about possible sequels and record them.

When I am watching these three movies, I am longing for a simpler time, when my biggest responsibility was getting the potatoes peeled before dad got home from work.

Nostalgia; I had a great childhood. I had some great friends. It is something worth remembering.


21 Jump Street
A TV teen crime drama.

I don't usually go for drama. I am more of an adventure/comedy personality.

I didn't like the show when it was being filmed. I didn't get into it until it was in reruns a few years later. I now own the entire series on DVD.

I have some favourite episodes, and a list of episodes I would rather skip.

When I am depressed about JJ, I like to watch Johnny Depp. He is one of the (very) few "cute" actors that I think is attractive. I will watch any Johnny Depp show when I am depressed about JJ.

It wasn't until I owned the whole series that I realized how good-looking Peter DeLouise was. Not someone my friends would have swooned over, but I find him attractive -- I just had to get to know his character first.

Now that I have the whole series, I find that Peter DeLouise is much more "real" than Johnny Depp. Johnny Depp has the physical beauty, but Peter DeLouise relies more on his personality, and that is a much better measure of his "attractiveness" than how he looks.


Black and White Movies
I have always enjoyed watching old movies. The old black and whites. Even some silent films.

When it comes to Silent Films, it is an intellectual thing. I am interested in the history of entertainment. So, in addition to being entertained, I want to know what people found "entertaining" a century ago. One of my favourites is Metropolis.

Again, it is a simpler time. Most B&W films are older, from a time when people did not feel the need to lock their doors. They did not feel the need to use violence to catch the attention of the audience.

When I am watching B&W movies, I am looking for wholesome entertainment and insight into the values of the past. Or, I want a good laugh (have you ever watched a B&W Sci Fi film?). I guess the biggest draw of the old B&W films is entertainment. Non-violent, simple entertainment that gives me something to think about (the simplicity of times gone by).


I am likely to add titles or genres to this post in the future. If so, it will appear below this paragraph. For now, this will do. I guess it boils down to: I watch shows to be entertained; or to have my mood lifted or reinforced.

Mother In Law

MIL does not speak to me anymore. She has not spoken to me at all since I brought JMJ home form her house last Spring.

JJ tells me MIL does not like me blackmailing her.

It appears that she chose to take something I said out of context and twist it around so I am the bad guy.

Too bad.

For her.

Every time I am out and about, I keep an eye open for her. I have been waiting to bump in to her on the street, or at the mall.

It finally happened last week.

IJ and I were about to leave Sechelt when I spotted MIL and NH walking down the street. IJ wanted to say "hi", so I parked the car and we went over to see them.

IJ and NH had a nice chat, and MIL did not say much... out of character for her.

It was nice.

Everyone was pleasant. IJ and NH made plans to go out for lunch the next day.

When NH picked IJ up for lunch, IJ asked him to fix a toy for him. NH took the toy home with him, and a couple of days later, dropped it off at the office when I was working. We exchanged a few friendly words, and he left.

I looked out the window while we were talking, and I saw MIL in the parking lot... pacing.

She really does not want to talk to me! She was irritated just being nearby... and she was at the far side of the parking lot - thinking that I did not know she was there!

It does not bother me that she will not talk to me. It is actually somewhat of a relief. I think it is funny! She once told me that she was intimidated by her mother-in-law... I am not, so she has a problem with me. It is hilarious!

As long as it does not affect the kids.

I have mentioned to 3 or 4 people that MIL is not talking to me anymore. I am careful to not say anything around the kids. I seem to have reasonable contact with NH, so I can still make sure they are not isolated from their grandmother.

I just do not have to talk to her!